I’m continually amazed at what I found myself doing when I should be working. It’s like I wake up in a fugue state and this is what I find:
That I’ve been playing solitaire for two hours. I prefer Vegas style and keeping a score which means I get to see that if I was playing this in a casino I’d be out nearly $1000. It’s confirmation that I should never ever gamble. I always lose.
I start sorting my yarn and setting aside projects that I’ve started or planned. Somehow I believe I can finish all 60 of them and need to have them next to my seat on the couch. This results in a yarn nest perpetually next to the couch. Then I start an entirely new project. No self-control.
I’ve gathered up every bottle of nail polish around the house, organized them all and put them all away. Then I decide it’s a good time to paint my nails and I start pulling a few things out again leaving it all exactly as I originally found it. I do this every. single. time.
I’m still not caught up on the Fail Blog posts that piled up over the holidays. I’ve been looking at them for hours and I feel a weird sense of accomplishment for bringing the total of unread posts down to 107. Then I realize that it isn’t actually an accomplishment.
I pay an unusual amount of attention to my skin care. Somehow, I feel now is the time to use the face mask cream I have, I tweeze, and I moisturizer. It’s amazing how much time this can burn when I really should be doing something else.
I get a lot of laundry done when I’m supposed to be doing something else. Laundry is my favorite chore because my method consists of dumping clean clothes in a pile on my bed, filling and running the machine, and sitting on the couch watching BBC America.
I make a lot of lists. I make a lot of lists of the things I should be doing instead of making lists. Nothing like a list to delay the actual work. I do take this tactic to a whole new level though. I make diagrams, timelines, phases, etc. It’s epic planning at its best.
The best part of all these is how well they eat up the day. I love when I’m deep into procrastination mode and then I’m shocked when I see it is 8pm at night. I’m not sure I should be disgusted or impressed at my procrastination skills. I probably should get paid for them considering the level of procrastination professionalism I display.
If procrastination became my job, does that mean I would work to avoid the procrastination?